A few days ago, a friend video called and we chatted about our childhood because we were in the same class for 3 years in primary school. For some reasons, it kinda stimulated me and here i am to blog about my childhood.
Unlike most children, my childhood was not one with all the love and attention from family nor with admiration from their teachers and peers. My childhood, was more of discipline and hardship. One of the major reasons for this was because my mum was one of the strictest mothers among my peers. I remember she never allowed me and my brother to eat junks or watch tv for more than an hour. Can you believe that i actually never ate instant noodles before standard 5? Once, she even cut the plug of tv and threatened that the tv would explode if bro or i ever tried to switch it on. funny u c..because i sincerely believed that was the absolute fact for one whole year until bro showed me the tv din explode when he switched it on..nor did it sprung to live tho. Worse thing is, i was always beaten up badly when i din score as good as she expected me to for my exams. She even sent me to different tuition classes when i was only 6 just to ensure i was catching up with all the different languages we gotta learn to survive in m'sia. It was really hard but somehow, i wanna thank her for all she did because it was all because of her that i am where i am today.
And soon, i was in my standard 3 and the most disastrous storm had yet to hit my family. Dad passed away and left us nothing but his will. Well, although i was very young, i understood what death meant but not all the things that came along with it. Recalling that part of my memory, it tasted really bitter because every night after dinner, i would stand beside my mum and watch her cry while she washed the dishes. There was nothing i could do for being too young...and thanks to my inmature-ness, i got into unnecessary argument with my relatives because i was not the kind of adorable kid who was grateful for everything she had but instead, was the kind that demanded more and more when she gets her bit. And that pretty much explained why until today, i was unable to form tight bonds with my relatives. *i-seriously-did -try-to-amend-it*
And one year passed, i was in standard 4. I thought things would be better but how wrong was i. I met one of the person i hated most till today - my form teacher. When i was young, i was in the first, which means the best class of my form. My mother and i were really proud for being able to squeeze into this class but the reality was, i was not good enough as i was a lazy bum who never completed her homework and i have to emphasize here the amount of homework i got every single day was insanely huge! Everyday, i got caned until i feared to go to school so much. Sometimes, i even got screwed for no particular reasons or some reasons that the teacher herself made up. Once, my palm bleed due to excessive wracking and mum said she wana complain to the headmaster but i din allow her to because i honestly believed that what the teacher did to me was for my own good. It was not until recent years that i found out the reason she hit me was not totally due to me not doing my homework..but was more because of her prejudice towards me, she thought that i was a lazy, dirty bum from poor family who needed the 'ultimate-cane-of the century'. And since that day onwards, i told myself i will never forgive this person for she did to me.
Well, that pretty much sum up all the bad things that happened in my childhood and perhaps from there you could see what kind of a person i really am because i guess most part of me was formed during that period of my life. Nonetheless, i wish to thank all those who stood by me through the most horrible time of my life.To name a few..it has got to be my mother who had so much faith in me when everyone else doubted me, my brother, tho i dun really remember what he did to encourage me to go on..and my childhood friends for befriending me when everyone else left me behind.
Cheers!
